Procastinate to celebrate!

I am putting off some serious business to write this post, but I just have to remember how great I feel at the moment! I promised a friend that I’d fulfill his request for a painting he is planning to give as a gift. I have to work at 6 AM, so I should be getting in sleepy mode. However, I just can’t get over a few things.

The first half of my day was pretty stupid. I won’t even go into it, except to say that I managed to cut myself. Not thaaaat badly, in fact it’s just a few times worse than a paper cut. So why does hurt more than worse cuts I’ve gotten in the past? Yuck. At least I have a couple pictures for the next baking round up!

The latter half has been wonderful! I have a really embarrassing story to share, a major low calorie recipe discovery, and victories upon victories! I did have a headache when I got off work this evening (told ya it was really stupid) and I was so hungry. Last night, I bought groceries so I was able to snack on veggies while I prepared a breakfast in the afternoon treat.

Quick aside.. Since I’m happily employed, I’ve been on the fence whether to share the recipes I come up with for work. Just to be careful, I have decided not to, although I don’t mind mentioning the ingredients.  Don’t worry fellow calorie counters, the at home meals I prepare will be defined in great detail! I make no claims to know anything about what a meal should contain except the calorie count. In general, I try to keep my days full of fruits, veggies, protein and whatever carbs I can squeeze in and not have MyFitnessPal give me a negative red count.

Now, breakfast in the afternoon.  I’m not a food photographer with a fancy camera Imageand to help my aunt and cousin get ideas, I text them photos of my meals. This is one of those photos and I never intended it to end up here, but why not.

Ingredients: One egg, 1/2 cup of frozen hash browns, 1/2 cup of Boca meatless crumbles, one slice of wheat toast, strawberries

The egg is prepared “fried” and by that I mean I just cooked it in the same pan after I made my fake sausage and potatoes.

For the sausage:

1/2 cup of Boca Meatless Crumbles

Season with salt, pepper, 1 teaspoon of fennel seeds. Cook until firm. You won’t believe how much this tastes like sausage! After that, I spread my hash browns out, salt a teeeeny bit more (don’t need any more water weight here) and cook until potatoes are done. I set it out in a plate, cooked and peppered the egg and toasted my bread. I really had my heart set on jelly and I doubt there’s a substitute I’ll ever like. Sugar free jelly is HORRIBLE! So I tried some strawberries on it and it was okay. Doubt I’ll eat it like that again. The cheese on top added about 35 calories. Grand total: I rounded to 300 to cover the olive oil I coated the pan in.

After I ate, my headache still persisted so I convinced my husband to accompany me back to my coffee shop for cappuccinos. Cappuccino, as in a six ounce drink consisting of a double shot of espresso and a very small couple ounces of milk. This is where one of the most awkward moments of my life ever took place.

We were hanging out near the bar where people pick up their drinks. I was observing customers reactions to the treats. One lady, no younger than 150 years, scowled in shock at my S’mores brownie. Yeah, spoiler for the baking round up.

This is her:


Next up, I saw a guy come in and since this is my weight loss blog, I’ll call him out. He must have weighed at least 600 pounds. The reason he caught my eye though, was because he reminded me of Dennis Nedry from Jurassic Park.


So imagine my surprise, when I’m facing the wall and sipping my drink, when I feel him stroll right up behind me. Did he know what I was thinking? We have a stupid little write up about puppies, unattended children and light roast coffees on that wall, so I thought maybe he was reading that. A few painful moments passed, when I hear “Excuse me?” I turn around and his eyes are crossed every which way. My eyes dart back and forth trying to secure eye contact and I smile. “Do you know where the “insert old consignment shop in the building beside us” is?”

PHEW. Wait. Why is he asking ME out of everyone here? Couldn’t he ask one of the kids at the register? Fuck it, I thought and without a second wasted, “OHTHEYCONSOLIDATEDTHATWITHTHESALONBYTHERE”.

He nods and asks me if a weight loss place nearby is accessible right now. It’s after 6 and honestly, I think they observe business hours, at least the doctor does, so I say no. He thanks me and off they go. Even though these businesses just a few hundred feet away, he asks the old lady with him if she’d like to drive. “Walkin’s good for us!” Off they go.

Terror and embarrassment washes over me as I realize I still had on my t-shirt of my workplace. I felt like such a bitch for trying to ignore this guy, this guy probably trying so hard to lose weight and maybe even buy some new clothes.


I had on flip flops and stretchy pants! I was drinking a cappuccino! I wasn’t in represent my work mode.. I hope he thinks I was just caught off guard.

I knocked back the rest of my little coffee and went home. The caffeine took care of my headache and I started on my friend’s painting. The clouds kept rolling in and out, threatening to ruin my tennis plans. My headache returned! I thought for the smallest second about not going. Nope, I’m going! I went to find some shorts and my chihuahua peed on them. The others were dirty, and I couldn’t wear pants, it would be too hot. You go through SO many clothes when you exercise a lot. So I put a spare pair of my husband’s shorts and hoped no one would be around.  They weren’t. We had a great game and once I got moving, I felt my headache dissipate. I’m so bad, I coined the term “calorie blasters” for when I have to chase the ball across the court because I hit the pole the net is attached to. We power walked a lap around the track and came home where I discovered that Frank’s Red Hot is ZERO calories. ZERO!

It has such a buttery hot sauce taste, that I figured it must have at least 20 or so. Nope! Put that shit on everything, indeed. So I diced some grilled chicken breast, coated it in the hot sauce, put it in a 90 calorie tortilla, a bit of cheese and grilled myself a quesadilla. I thought about dipping it in ranch, but the Light Ranch I had STILL had 80 calories for 2 tablespoons. Piss. I had fat free sour cream in the fridge but I was just really needing some ranch flavor in my life. I hit the google and was rewarded with this recipe, which I mixed with fat free sour cream and no buttermilk powder.

In the words of a five year old makeup guru, you gotta fry it!!

So here’s another photo of my food I sent to my aunt.. The legendary quesadilla and my vat of ranch.


I didn’t eat all that ranch. My quesadilla and share of ranch ended up being maybe 175 calories! I sometimes just eat something like that for dinner and then go on a tear of good snacks. So I splurged on Raisin Bran for dessert and lots of berries. I still have almost 300 calories left for the day but I’m full.

I think that’s enough celebrating for the day.

Recap: Didn’t use excuses to get me out of tennis and I discovered my favorite hot sauce is zero calories and a substitute for ranch! 8/10 would live this day again.


5 thoughts on “Procastinate to celebrate!

  1. I had so much fun reading this! Watch out for the hot sauce, they usually have a billion milligrams (or whatever the appropriate measurement is) of sodium, which always hinders my weight loss progress! Keep up the good work chica!

    • Thanks Jessey!! I was living vicariously through your Portland post. And you’re totally right, I’m so dismayed that Frank’s red hot miracle actually contains nearly 40% of my recommended sodium in 2 tbsp. Lesson learned.

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